A Special Match (Happy 100th Blog Entry)

 

So, I got an interesting match on a dating app on Friday.

Her profile said she was from Houston so I asked her about life at Houston and what brought her here but she didn’t feel like answering that. Instead asking me how I was. Well, you know me, still the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. The Universe’s one true constant. I asked how she was doing this week. She was here in Provo for a few days but would be heading back home on Sunday. So, these messages went back and forth pretty quickly. I’d send her a message and she’d send one right back. So I replied and so did she shortly after. Kind of suspicious because normally I have to wait a day or two or three or a week. - _ -

But this is how conversations are normally supposed to go so kind of not suspicious as well. But, at the same time, scammers do try and love-bomb losers to get their attention.

            “They love-bomb losers? Don’t you get that?”

Yes.

            “…”

Anyway. I was conflicted if this is a real person or not. But her next message definitely pushed me completely to one side.

            “You into hook ups? NSA hooks ups? Gotta be straight with you I don’t want to beat around the bush.”

 

So I’m just thinking: An attractive blond woman wants to sleep with me? Uh huh, yeah, sure.

 


 

I figured I’d just be upfront. When in doubt, be legit, upfront and nice. I told her I had never done No Strings Attached before. I have no idea how that goes. I was thinking maybe we could go to Dutch Bros. It’s this coffee place in Provo that the locals rave about. Maybe we could meet up and go from there?

 

No response. Of course not! Scammers don’t want to meet in person. They can’t because they’re not really here. They just want to trick fuckboys into handing over money. Good on me for being the nice, honest person. And this is legit where I was going to end the story.

 

You see, Scammers tend to unmatch shortly afterwards, trying to avoid being reported and banned off the app. Makes sense, Apps don’t want you giving your money to anyone but them. But this one didn’t disappear. It’s been almost a week now and she’s still there. Her location changed from Provo to Sierra Vista….a suburb south of Houston.

 

Whoops! Now I’m wishing I could reload an old save. See if pretending I’ve definitely done NSA encounters and totally know what it’s like will result in a different outcome. I swear it feels like there’s a writer that deliberately messing with me -_-

 

Well, at least I screwed up by being honest (which I’m told is the best policy). Even if I didn’t think she was a scammer, I would have replied in the same manner because, well, it’s me. I can’t help but just be honest with people. Even if it screws me over in the end (or not screwing me in this case

 


 

Actually! Ok, um, quick update to the original post. The profile is still there. And the location changed again (Hinge allows you to manually alter your location without using GPS). So this profile is now in Centrum. Google points me to the multivitamin. Wiki states there are some locations with that name. None in America, mind you. Greenland, Suriname, Netherlands, Sweden and Poland. (another edit: Now in New Orleans). Yeah, so maybe I should be a bit more careful when dealing with people who are a bit too eager to meet me. I'll admit I was doubting myself for a bit there. Utah Jake said he would have lied and I was thinking 

    "Well, he's from Utah so he knows how dating goes here. And it's not like being honest has been all that helpful to me. Maybe he's right and I'm just a naive noob for not realizing this is just how the game is played?" But, nope, turns out honesty really is the best policy (for not getting scammed, at least)

On the plus side, it seems like I was originally right about the profile. So, yay for being right....?

 

P.S. Profile moved to St Paul. So I just reported the account. Probably should have done this sooner but at least now I have proof and could tell them about how they change locations around.

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